Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Worry. Concern, and Letting Go (plus, another book)

First off, before I forget, I finished another book with one of my very favorite characters, Dismas Hardy. It took me a couple days to finish John Lescroart's Dead Irish, but it was very good, and I am glad I found it on Paperbackswap.com. (BTW, if you haven't checked that site out, do it. What a great idea, and what a convenience. Love, love, love it.)

So, on the other things. For a few months, the Carolina-dook game has been on my calendar, me waiting with eager anticipation. But something came up: my sister is having bypass surgery tomorrow. Suddenly, the game isn't the biggest thing anymore.

Then, I feel a little guilty, because it is still a big deal to me. Very, very few people get this about me, but Carolina Basketball is part of who I am. I won't equate the season with my family (sister, parents, husband, or my kids), but, dang, is it close. I know I shouldn't, but I still care a great deal about the outcome of that game. If something happens bad in NC, then the importance of the game will recede, I am sure. If I was asked to, I would miss this game. But the thing is, I would remember that I was missing it. Does this make me abnormal?

So, the title of this post is Worry, Concern, and Letting Go. I have never worried about things in my entire life. If you have control, and it needs changing, then change it. If you don't have control, then you get concerned, but that is all--you can't fix anything, so why worry? Concern is different--you care, and you anticipate an outcome, and you pick up pieces when you have to, but worry? Nah. Now, I am in the middle of a situation over which I have no control, I am concerned, but it is completely someone else's to deal with (my son's). I have to let this go, but I am still very, very concerned about the direction of his life. But I have to let this go: it isn't mine, I can't own it, and I can't fix it. Letting go is so hard.

So, Go Surgeons! Go Jaymi! Go Sam!

Go Heels! Beat dook!


SoSock said...

Almost afraid to ask, but....
I hope things went well with your sister.
I came back to your blog because I saw "Playing for Pizza" in the bookstore yesterday and was trying to remember where I had heard something about it.
I remembered finding your site a while back when looking for other TarHeel-related blogs, and that you had posted about some books you had recently read. Sure enough, there was "Playing for Pizza" in your post. Not much about it though, just that you enjoyed it. It did seem to be a departure from his usual stuff. I think I'll pick it up.
Obviously - books and college sports pale next to family health issues in terms of importance, and also next to our children's life choices. I just happen to be dealing with both of those issues myself right now. I hope both situations turn out the way they're supposed to for you.
And when those issues are weighing us down, we can always lose ourselves for a while watching those cardiac-inducing Tarheels!
I know - the Duke game was a bummer, but the last 2 have been incredible, especially the Clemson game. And even better that they've pulled them off without Lawson, eh?

Displaced Heel said...

Thanks for your concern and your comment. Man, when things start to pile up, is IS good to know that you can escape into the world of basketball, and somehow that game makes sense.

I did like Playing for Pizza, and I hope you do too. Have you read Will Blythe's "To Hate Like This is to Be Happy Forever"? If not, you really, really need to. About more than basketball. My sister that had surgery bought it for me for my birthday a couple years ago, and it is a must read for any Tar Heel lover.

Displaced Heel said...

Sosock, did you read down when I spoke about Playing for Pizza? I did really like it--the box is just titles of books I am reading. I hope you enjoy it!